I currently work as a writer for Football Talk NT, and I will be covering an FFA Cup match tonight. And I’m pretty knowledgeable about football, so I’m going to talk you through exactly what will happen.

The teams playing are Casuarina and Mindil Aces. On the weekend Mindil won a Sunday evening match, while Casuarina had the bye. So I expect Casuarina to be a bit off the pace in the opening stages and Mindil to go ahead early on. But Casuarina are a good side, I expect them to be level by halftime.

I expect Mindil to tire in the second half after their weekend game, which will be exploited by Casuarina. But not for long, because in the 68^th minute a helicopter will fly over Darwin Football Stadium.

This helicopter will unintentionally drop its cargo. A four metre croc that it was returning to Alligator River. The croc has been tranquilised, but its landing in the middle of the field will wake it up. It survives the fall and goes into a berserk rage.

When it fell one player was so close that he fell to the ground, he stood no chance. The croc, let’s call her Flower, quickly gobbles him up and runs toward the referee. Flower doesn’t have the pace to catch him though. And the referee abandons the match because of safety concerns.

And that is what will happen tonight.