I met an interesting man on the weekend, his name is Samsung Galaxy.

He’s 299 years old, born on Mercury, lives in a giraffe, married a girl called Barcelona and has a pet elephant.

He writes in Japanese, speaks in Greek, but only hears Italian, yet loves Indigenous sculpture.

He talks of a time in 1908 when Argentina invaded Venus only to be killed by butterflies from Jupiter. He called it The Great Apple.

He also has Alzheimer’s, although he calls it The Unbelievable Truth.