What do I call it?

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I have been told I should write a book! A book! A whole book! A book is long! I can barely finish a cup of tea without thinking, “Why am I drinking a cup of tea?”

I get distracted easily. To write a whole book would take ages! I can’t concentrate for that long! I think the longest I can concentrate for would be 90 minutes, the length of a football match. But if it goes into extra time I would concentrate for the extra half hour, and the shootout if it went to penalties.

But a book would take longer than 90 minutes to write! It’s a book! A long, long, long book. It’s like a ruler, you know, those ten centimetre ones. Think of that like a news article or a blog post, maybe a long one might be a 15-30 centimetre one. Than a newsletter is a metre ruler. But a book is like a 100 metre measuring tape they use to measure how far you can throw a javelin. It’s really, really, really long!

Now the only question is… what to write the book about?

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