“Brothers and sisters, I am a time thief from the future. I am about to extract every second of your lives and place it in a container.

“I will then take that container back to my own time and use it to live for eternity.

“There is nothing you can do to stop me. I’m not really sorry. I’m bringing an end to your pitiful existence. The life of a peasant is certainly not for me.”

“Excuse me, just wondering, what if by us not existing anymore it means you never exist?”

“Well, umm, actually, that’s a good point. I’ll be right back.”